Guess who's back.... back again

[SD Zannon]

That's right Ladies and Rodians, SD Zannon is BACK like a heart attack!

I'm here for you all and to answer all those unanswered questions that need answers...and answers to..... ok you get the idea.

So bring 'em large and small. Bring them purple or green. Bring them Furry or Scaley. I miss our little talks.

(And for those who are wondering where I went, let me just say 3 things.... Kaadara Beach, Bothan Twins, Zancorp Expense Account. Booya!)

[Skarr]

Dear SD Zan man...

I've been trying to figure this out for years. Why is it that as a zabrak I am bald on my head, but the rest of me is hairy as a wookiee. The grooming is getting out of hand. Can you help me?

Mayor McHairy

[SD Zannon]

Dear Mayor McHairy,

That sounds like you have a rare Zabrak birth disease called Wookantitis. Wookantitis strikes one in every 500 Zabaraks born but only manifests itself if you have the following 4 envrionmental and behavioral symptoms.

1. You live in a desert climate
2. You are a prominent figure, like a Mayor.
3. You rant a lot.
4. You have every had sexual relations with a wookiee.

I suggest you take a few months off to rest and relax. Try drinking a lot of Dathomirian Tea (I know it tastes awful but it works) and avoid all contact with wookies.

If that doesn't work try the Kryyshhshahkkwkllsaashkak. That is an ancient Wooking Grooming Ceremony. It may hurt a lot more for a Zabrak but in the end you get a treat and a nice cone collar to wear.

Best of luck your Hairyness,
SD Zannon

[Dwilah]

Dear SD Zannon,

Can you recommend a good day spa in Kaadara?

-Dwilah

[SD Zannon]

Dear SD Zannon,

Can you recommend a good day spa in Kaadara?

-Dwilah

Dear Sweet Thang Dwilah,

Why I can do better than that, my dear. I can take you there.
I know you tire of the "Tall Zannon" and his one-track-pirate ways. Let a real Rodian show you a wonderful time.

Near Kaadara is a wonderful place called "Spa Wars." They have the best service, great food, and the best Saarlac Spa I have every been in. Just bring a blaster.

And leave that other Blue Rodian home. This trip is just for you and me. If you want I'll lock him in his structure factory again. He's such a sap for when I leave food in there.

And one more thing.... those twins meant nothing to me.

All my affection,
SD Zannon

[Dwilah]

Dear SD Zannon,

Can you recommend a good day spa in Kaadara?

-Dwilah

Dear Sweet Thang Dwilah,

Why I can do better than that, my dear. I can take you there.
I know you tire of the "Tall Zannon" and his one-track-pirate ways. Let a real Rodian show you a wonderful time.

Near Kaadara is a wonderful place called "Spa Wars." They have the best service, great food, and the best Saarlac Spa I have every been in. Just bring a blaster.

And leave that other Blue Rodian home. This trip is just for you and me. If you want I'll lock him in his structure factory again. He's such a sap for when I leave food in there.

And one more thing.... those twins meant nothing to me.

All my affection,
SD Zannon

Dear SD Zannon,

With your shorter stature, is there any reassurance that preformance is better than "taller Zannon" to make up for any...other...stature defficiencies?

-Dwilah

[Jorhel]

SD Zannon,

Where are all the fly Rodian women at?

- Jorhel & Artie

[E-bo Obi]

Dear SD Zannon,

With your shorter stature, is there any reassurance that preformance is better than "taller Zannon" to make up for any...other...stature defficiencies?

-Dwilah

Just leaving yourself open with that.

[Skarr]

Dear SD Zannon

I have been trying to get out of my house to get into the action, but a processor seems fried and I can't get out. The water in my aquarium/bedroom is getting stale. I can't get any fish food flakes if I can't get out. What should I do?

Trapped in my own Fish Bowl

[Jorhel]

Dear SD Zannon,

Are fleshy head tail steaks really a delicacy in some parts of the universe? If so, how should they be prepared?

- Jorhel and Artie

[Ekade]

Dear SD Zannon,

Is your doghouse smaller than Zannon's? Or is it the same size in order to fit your bulbous melon?

- In the Doghouse

[Skarr]

Dear Lazy AsSD Zannon,

why is taking so long for you to reply to your questions? Is there a rodian Porn-fest on the holonet and you can't drag yourself away from it? What gives?

Impatient in Nocturnus

[SD Zannon]

SD Zannon,

Where are all the fly Rodian women at?

- Jorhel & Artie

Dear Jorhel & Artie,

That is a good question. I'd love to answer that but Jabba invited me to his palace for some new delicacy called "Rodian Surpise." I'd love to stay and answer but I hear this stuff is good. I'll ask him though, maybe he knows. I hear he's been hiring a lot of Rodian females lately.

Hungry and on the Run,
SD Zannon

[SD Zannon]

Dear SD Zannon

I have been trying to get out of my house to get into the action, but a processor seems fried and I can't get out. The water in my aquarium/bedroom is getting stale. I can't get any fish food flakes if I can't get out. What should I do?

Trapped in my own Fish Bowl

Dear Trapped,

I strongly suggest you seize this opportunity. Bascially the hand of the almighty has touched you and forced a better life upon you. From here on out you can do wonderous thinks like spend time with your loved ones, read a book, get stuff done around the aquarium, and even obtain what I like to call the "Holy Grail of Gamers." Others call it sleep.

So enjoy this time because as soon as that new processor comes in the mail its bye bye sensible life and HELLO GURK SLAYING!!

Best of luck,
SD Zannon

[SD Zannon]

Dear SD Zannon,

Are fleshy head tail steaks really a delicacy in some parts of the universe? If so, how should they be prepared?

- Jorhel and Artie

Dear J & A,

No, not at all. Head tails contain no meat at all, only gray matter. Their exterior is hard and leathery while the endermis is stringy and tough. Its not good eats at all.

You want to try something REALLY good though? Go for some Tranny Ribs. Trandosian ribs are some of the finest food in the galaxy. I hear Ruby's just added them to the menu. Tastey!

P.S. Don't tell Skarr his cousin was in town. He was never here. Got that?!

Bon Appetite!
SD Zannon