Joke of the Day

[Skarr]

just catching up on my email and got these forwarded to me and thought we should have a joke forum:

A male coworker walks up very close to a lady standing at the coffee
machine, inhales a big breath of air and tells her that her hair smells
nice.

After a week of this she can't stand it anymore. She takes her complaint to
a supervisor in the personnel department and states that she wants to file a
sexual harassment grievance against him.

The Human Resources supervisor is puzzled by this decision and asks,
"What's sexually threatening about a coworker telling you that your hair
smells nice?"

The woman replies, " It's Paul, the midget."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two Mexicans, who had been lost in the desert for weeks, were at death's
door. As they stumbled on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis
or something similar, they suddenly spied through the heat & haze, a
tree off in the distance.
As they get closer, they began to make out that the tree was draped with
rasher upon rasher of bacon. There was smoked bacon, crispy bacon, juicy
nearly raw bacon of all sorts.

"Hey, Pepe," cried Don Pedro, "ees a bacon tree! We are saved!"

"You're right, amigo!" said Pepe as he went on ahead to the tree,
salivating at the prospect of food.

When he got to within five feet of the tree, the sound of machine gun
fire erupted and down he went in a hail of bullets.

Don Pedro quickly dropped down on the sand and called out to his dying
friend, "Pepe! Pepe! Que pasa hombre?"

With his dying breath, Pepe called out, "Run amigo, run! Ees not a bacon
tree. Ees a ham bush."

[MrDooo]

C'mere so I can slap you.

[Skarr]

C'mere so I can slap you.

I was just there, you missed your chance

[MrDooo]

And yet, I still feel the urge.

/stand
/walk 3 meters;
/target seret;
/slap;
/pause 10;
/startdance poplock;
/pause 60;
/return to desk

[Seret Sajet]

And yet, I still feel the urge.

/stand
/walk 3 meters;
/target seret;
/slap;
/pause 10;
/startdance poplock;
/pause 60;
/return to desk

/kneel;
/target mess'tar;
/2handedheadhit3;
/pointat;
/laugh;
/laugh;
/laugh;
/laugh;
/cough;
/laugh;